Feeling stressed ab the internship I ought to do.. Or internshipS, in plural. 600 hours, working, and most likely without getting paid for it. Gah, I should get that thing going, no replies yet to my work application. Maybe I'll just go and visit the place some day when the boss is around. Crap.
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Had a little evening workout here and redecorated my flat. All because the kitty didn't seem to like the idea of her in her carriage thing. She's been all quiet and nice all these past few days, but oh boy did she run for it and started talking now! Nice, really nice. Definitely gave me a run for my money there, and a few battle scars.. But I succeeded, after a 20 minutes of hunting. Broke my heart to give her away and to depart like this. I really love cats, one of my friends even started calling me "the crazy cat lady" :D Would be cool to own one, but at this point of my life it wouldn't work out since I travel so much.
Gonna have some new songs w/ my band for the next gig we have in Oulu, Saturday 1.st of October. Total 5-7 new songs.. We go to Oulu the day before the gig and rehearse the next morning, a few hours before the gig that is. Crazy, I think, I would prefer we'd play together alot more than we do now, and with that amount of rehearsing together before the show... is always exciting. But it's worked out before and thank god everyone knows what they're doind, so it's cool.
That's why I would like to have another band besides IIRIS, since I don't get to play together as much as I would like to. Ever since we all moved far away from each other, it's been now what, over two years, I felt like dying. It sucks ass when u don't get to do the thing u love absolutely most in this world. Luckily Heidi's back from France so we get to have gigs now, but still. It isn't enough. Even though we'd have gigs every weekend it would still not be enough. I want to play different kind of music, I guess that's the problem. The party-music sure is fun, but I dunno.. Something's changed. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that practically everyone else in that group is talking about getting married, having kids, buying a house blablablaBLEH. U're all so young, what is wrong with you?! I try so hard not to think about it, and everyone keeps telling me it's all gonna work out, but I doubt it. I wonder whether will I ever be okay. I can't get this thing out of my head, this little voice that keeps saying.. there's got to be more than this. I am so frustrated. Something's missing and I can't get around it. I don't mean to sound desperate, but I can't lie it hasn't had an effect on me. I just feel like shouting out loud.
Love my gurls to bits, but I gotta say one thing that I've learned here: I am never ever going to join all-female-band again. :D
Taking a small trip down the memory lane. Me and Satu at RaaheFestivals this summer -11. Sun, beer, gig as the last act - that's what I'm talking about.
This one's from Midsummer Day -10. We were in Levi and had a huuuge apartment all to ourselves. This is one of the things I love most doing this: Everyone's getting ready, the sound system guy's making lame-ass-jokes, someone's arguing about the set list, everyone's having a drink.. The best.
Alright, 'till next time! Something more positive maybe.
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